This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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