it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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