I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
