doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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