I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
