your parents love me but you hate me
White coat. Heels.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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