It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
