I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
