Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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