He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
