i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
The best revenge is premature balding
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
