Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
