you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
