everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
