It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
