bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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