i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
