Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
