why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
