are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize