yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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