You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
