I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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