so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
