i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize