Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
