Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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