I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
