What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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