4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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