I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
