so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
