maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
