Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
