You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize