so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize