That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Your dad touched me again.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
