i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
