i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
