I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
