I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
