"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
