Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
