You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
