You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
