Pappa wants mamma naked
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
