hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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