I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Randomize
