That's intense
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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