but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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